pray i find out what the heck i did to bring on all this crap, or if i didnt do anything, that God can bring me peace in knowing its not my fault and that theres nothing i can do about it.
its crazy, but i feel like theres not much more i can take, yet i still have a "bring it on" type attitude,
like... if this is God testing me, then well i still have the bring it on attitude. even through this im not giving up on God. so i hope if this is him testing me that he gets the picture soon, that through times of trial i wont abandon him.